"Have faith"

"Have faith," she tells me, and as much as it grates sometimes - scrapes along the edges of my nerves and ignites my frustration, it usually turns out that she's right. These are not wordsshe has oft spoken until recently - the last few years have brought about this belief - this faith. That if you have faith and trust, things will work for the best.

I am not practiced or terribly able with this - faith is new to me. I am, if not a pessimist, most certainly a realist. However, the more I trust, the more I find she is right. The problems and obstacles begin to be brushed aside as if in answer to my desperation and prayers. Not simply cleared aside, but eased; lessened enough to allow me to shoulder them and continue onward.

It saddens me, a bit, to feel that something I cherished has ended - or ended for now, because who knows what the future holds - but I realize it is the best thing for me; it is the healthiest thing for me. It's what I need to have happen so that I can move forward, gather my life together and remain as committed to the future we hope for with an easy and clear heart.

People change, and sometimes you need to let them leave your life.

And then there are people who change and are ready to become part of your life, and step forward to let you know.

Both have happened to me in the past few months. The first is exponentially more difficult than the second, but I'm trying to learn and understand it.

This was not what I intended to write - what I intended to write was that I am finding that the more faith I have, the more reasons I find to have it.