duality

I may have reclaimed a bit of my privacy - things are ironed out, I suppose. Or at least, they're ironed out enough that I can feel comfortable writing again.

I waver on the edge of elation and frustration, for entirely different reasons. The frustration is simple, I'm having what are rapidly becoming huge issues with my roommate. At this juncture, she owes me in the range of $800, the end of the month is coming up, at which point she'll owe me even more, and her bank account balance is in the negative because she's utterly fiscally irresponsible. If I could afford to live here on my own, we'd have parted ways as roommates by now, though most likely not as friends.

Elation...this sense of belonging and acceptance. Neither of us is perfect, neither of us has our head in the clouds, and neither of us is running. Even when we might want to, we fight to stay because we know that once the feeling passes we'll be right back to where we normally are. He sees me - understands what I'm about and who I am, and accepts me, although he's not afraid to tell me when he disapproves of or does not like something I've done. He is one of the most beautiful people I've ever met, and I am continually humbled by his presence. That's not to say he's on a pedestal - he's not perfect and I see that and accept it. There's a difference between being perfect, and being potentially perfect for me...